In Conclusion - My Personal Thoughts and Backstory

This is where I bring this blog to a close. I know one or two of you mentioned me continuing it, but my online life lies more in Livejournal and Tumblr than in Blogger. Besides, I'd rather leave these issues to people who are further invested in it than I am. If you would like to continue reading and learning more about trans people, here are a couple good sites to frequent: The Transadvocate and Genderqueer Identities.

There really is no reason for my posting this except I find it absolutely hilarious. Cookies if you get it.

Ever since I was a child, I've dabbled in blurring the lines of the gender binary. When my brother, cousin, and I would play "make believe" or "pretend" I always acted as a male character. This continued into my teenage and adult life in my roleplaying (which is creating a character and acting/reacting as they would to various situations; think kind of like improv writing or acting). I solely write as male characters. In the live action roleplay I participate in, I have two male characters. When I write, I love, love, love gender bending. I have several characters of an ambiguous gender, much to my father's chagrin.

As for myself, I have a very complicated gender identity. Well, not terribly so. I fall under "genderqueer" in that I feel male-minded, but female-bodied. I am (mostly) okay with this. I only have one friend (out of the few I've "come out" to) who treats me like a guy and uses male pronouns and I absolutely love it. Will I ever use testosterone and get surgery? Probably not. I don't need to conform to a certain gender code to feel happy with who I am.

  

Thanks again for all of your wonderful comments and for reading. I wish you all the best as we go through finals. Merry Christmas! Have a happy holiday season!

The Sad Truth of It - Hate Crimes Against Transgender People

This is something that, though upsetting, needs to be talked about. According to Transgender Law and Policy Institute "an estimated 2 to 5% of the population are transgender (i.e., experience some degree of gender dysphoria). The number of people who identify as transsexual and undergo sex-reassignment is smaller. Recent statistics from the Netherlands indicate that about 1 in 12,000 natal males undergo sex reassignment and about 1 in 34,000 natal females. Over time, the gap between the reported numbers of MTFs and FTMs transsexuals is closing."

As you can see, the numbers are staggering. It is the purpose of this blog to inform you of these issues. Even if only 15-20 people have read this, that's 15-20 who are now more knowledgeable of a minority group than before. Comments, such as the ones you guys have left me, are truly uplifting and knowing that you are even thinking and processing what you've read means I've done my job. Thank you. Thank you so very much for that.

Third Gender Options in Other Countries

Earlier this year, two major accomplishments occurred regarding transgender people.

Beauty pageant in Nepal

 For the first time during their census, Nepal took information on third gender people as well as men and women. A recent Supreme Court decision has allowed for a third gender choice on official government paperwork. Even with these steps forward, there is still some brutality against the LGBT community in Nepal. However, many members keep their hopes up due to the Court decision and the fact that Nepal is currently in the process of rewriting their constitution.

In Australia, people now have the ability to use a third gender marker on their passport. They now have the choice of male (M), female (F), or indeterminate (X). This allows transgender and gender variant people to travel without anxiety about their identification.


"There have been very many cases of people being detained at airports by immigration in foreign countries simply because their passports don't reflect what they look like," Louise Pratt, an Australian senator, told Australian radio. "It's very distressing, highly inconvenient and frankly sometimes dangerous."

Now, if only we could implement something like these countries have here in the U.S.

Third Gender - Fa'afafine and Hijra

After making the post about Andrej, I thought it would be neat to research third gender ideas from different cultures. Francessa pointed out the Fa'afafine culture in Samoa.
 

I love this picture on multiple levels.

Fa'afafine are biological males who exhibit a female gender orientation. They aren't always raised as females or the third gender, but neither are they encouraged or discouraged to act in a feminine way. While they are not limited to traditional female roles, it is common for them to do the same tasks as other women.

In India, there is a group known as the Hijra. Again, they are born males who now identify as females or neither gender. They sometimes live in self contained communities led by a guru.

Sadly, Hijra are seen as being of a low status, often having to beg or prostitute for money. Sometimes, they perform at ceremonies such as weddings or births. The people there cannot turn them away and will even pay them for fear the Hijra will release bad wuju on the infant or future infants. This comes from a myth where Ramayana left his devoted followers in a forest where they waited 14 years for him to return. Touched by their love, he gave them the ability to grant blessings on people during special occasions.

~*~

This is only a brief glimpse into how other countries view third gender or gender variant people. I could honestly start a whole other blog about them.

Andrej Pejic: Male model in women's clothes

Guy AND Doll: Man Models Women's Clothing

Gorgeous, yes?

The reason I am posting this video here I'd like for you guys to make note of his comments on his gender. Also, note how the reporter's questions seem to fall into binaries that he is trying to break. In my opinion, he handed them gracefully... which honestly, could you expect any less? I understand why she was asking him things like "Which bathroom do you use?" or "Do you see yourself as male or female?" Though, as the interview continues, she really is asking the same question again and again as if trying to trick him into saying something. Oi.

Part of his obvious appeal is his androgyny. In some ancient cultures, people who did not fall into gender binaries were seen as mystical and sometimes seen as being close to the gods. The fashion world's obsession probably stems from such beliefs, even if unknowingly. Beauty is beauty and Andrej Pejic is a beautiful person.

Transgender kids: Painful quest to be who they are

Gender Identity: A Change in Childhood - This is a video and article from CNN health about transgender children.

Too many times, parents of transgender children are accused of harming their child by encouraging them to live as the opposite gender. As in the case with these lesbian parents, they were accused of trying to make Tammy "like them." Having a transgender child is no easy task. Parents don't want this to happen. They didn't have the child and think "Oh gee, let me force him/her to be the opposite gender." (Though I'm sure there are some abuse cases where this has happened, it isn't what is going on here.)

The transgender child will face hardship in school with other children and even adults. The absolute BEST thing a parent can do is support their child.Too many times I've heard stories of transgender people being disowned or rejected by their parents. Shouldn't we praise those parents who do love their children unconditionally?

"When you talk about that, when you say that 'people know me for me' you are you."

Not surprisingly, the article received some harsh feedback: What fuels transgender backlash?

Professor Diane Everett put it best when she said "We tend as a society to put people into boxes. Someone who is transgender is not only crossing gender boundaries, but also defying them. If people can't relate to you as an either-or, they have a hard time relating to you in their general comfort level."

 My dad is one of those people who seem to think that things concerning the LBGT community are "sick" and "wrong." Love him to death, but he is definitely pro-traditional gender roles and anything that breaks those roles bothers him.

What do you think? Is it more harmful than not for parents to disregard their child's gender identity?

Q&A

Okay, sorry I haven’t gotten back to those of you with questions. I’ve been dealing with a broken car since June. HECTIC! CRAZY! Argh. But enough on that…

Right, so I’m making a separate entry to answer your questions because I feel it’s the best way for everyone to see the replies. Also, I’m unfamiliar with Blogger… bear with me.

Nena:

“I really like how you clarified the terms and used colors to explain them.”

Thanks! I’ve always enjoyed colorful things and they break up the monotony of a long post.

“But that pronoun thing really confused me. I've never heard of asking about preferred pronouns before. Maybe I misunderstood, but it doesn’t make any sense to me. Being transgendered means they identify with the “opposite” gender… so why don’t they just adopt the pronoun that corresponds with the gender they identify with, instead of creating new pronouns?”

Being transgender does not mean being the gender opposite one’s birth EVERY time. Some people identify as in between genders or neither gender. That’s why they adopt the new pronouns (which I get how confusing they can be). The reason it’s best to ask about preferred pronoun is to ensure that you do not offend the transperson. Sometimes, it’s obvious that the person is MTF or FTM, but other times (typically with those who are still transitioning) it’s not so clear. I promise you that if you take the time to ask, the person to whom you are speaking with be very grateful. Hope that answers your question. :)

“I met someone last semester and I honestly couldn’t tell if it was a male or female. Instead of choosing one gender, it seemed like he/she just blended them both. Or maybe he/she was trying to be the opposite gender and just didn’t quite reach that goal. Does that classify him/her as transgendered, or do transgendered people usually look like the gender they identify with?”

Funny thing about gender is that it may or may not classify a person as transgender. Some girls dress like boys, especially in today’s society. I have a friend who has always worn guy clothes simply because they fit her body type better, but she is most assuredly female. What classifies someone as transgender is when their mental image of themselves does not match the physical. They feel as though the gender assigned to them at birth is not who they really are.

Jayne H:

“Hi! I think your subject is very interesting. My best friend’s cousin is actually going through the whole FTM process, and was showing me pictures of him/her on facebook.”

Thanks! And that’s awesome! I wish your best friend’s cousin the best!

“Many of my friends are gay, and are mostly females, as well as identify with the other gender. I always call my lesbian friends (even if they look like men) “she” or “her” or whatever, and they prefer to be that way…or at least don’t mind.”

And that’s completely okay, as long as they’re fine with it! :)

“Last night as I was reading some material for one of my classes, the author defaulted to the masculine “he” and it totally caught me off guard and made me uncomfortable.”

Oh yes. In my critical theory class, we just discussed feminist criticism. They mentioned something about how it assumes a male experience in all things.

“Yet I think if I read some crazy pronoun like hizit or hirz or whatever it is I wouldn’t find it exactly pleasant, either.”

To be honest, I find them confusing too. Maybe one day it’ll become the norm. Who knows?

“At any rate, I’m looking forward to your future posts as I’m sure I have much to learn.”

Thanks! I certainly hope I can help.  :)

Francesca:

“Question, why is it, in the lgbt community, the b is kind of left out in all discussions? Like, everyone focuses on gay/lesbian and trans, but just skip over bisexuality, almost treating it like it's not a real sexual orientation by its exclusion. Maybe I'm reading too much into that, but it's something I've noticed. Like, trans is so counterculture that it's accepted, if that makes any sense, but bisexuality is accepted in pop culture and gets skipped?”

I kind of agree with you on that. One of the reasons I think there’s issue is that people seem to think if a bisexual person is with someone of the opposite gender, then they are no longer bi… WRONG! You don’t just stop liking women because you’re with a guy or vice versa. It’s rather silly that people seem to forget that. My best friend is bi, so I take a protective stance on it.

And I wish trans was more accepted.

“But either way, still a very cool blog/idea. I've been checking up on it from time to time. Thanks for finally updating! :)”

Thanks for reading! I’ll try to be better at it. There’s a billion things going on right now it seems. :P

NicktheRiot:

“I do have to say, before reading your blog; I may have made the mistake of asking someone about their sex instead of preferred pronoun. I dig it honestly, but it’s a little too mushy and I think I’m open minded enough and comfortable enough to say that from now on that is how I will approach that conversation. You have educated me, and at first I admit I disliked it because I knew I was wrong. […]. I think this blog will be an excellent opportunity for issues to be presented and it to be a place of open-minded people exchanging meaningful information and ideas. Thank you for this blog.”

Oh man. I’m so glad!! That’s really the reason I created this blog. A lot of times, people dislike something simple because they don’t understand it. I’m hoping that through understanding, people will realize that transfolk are people too. Thank you, thank you for your thoughtful comment. It means so much to me!

“P.S. I’d really like to show you the insanity of modern communication theories that are being taught sometime after class.”

I’d love to! Hopefully, after I get my car back, I’ll be able to stick around for a bit after class so we can discuss.

~*~

Please keep the questions coming! I’m writing this blog for the purpose of enlightenment, so if you’d like clarification on anything just let me know! Thank you all for your thoughtful comments and I hope we can keep the discussion going. :)

Who what now?

There seemed to be some confusion about the purpose of my blog. I apologize. Shoot, even I was having trouble finding exactly how to word my intentions. Transgenderism is constantly misunderstood. My aim is to help clarify things and bring transgenders into a positive light. This is probably a huge and maybe somewhat crazy undertaking due to mixed opinions on the subject. All I ask of you is to be polite and understanding. <3

And yes, one day I would like to work with transgendered youth. I mean that as children who are elementary to middle school age.

Two words that are super important to this blog (as they will be used quite frequently) are transgender and cisgender.

Transgender (sometimes shortened to “trans”): someone who identifies with a gender different from the one assigned at birth.

Cisgender (sometimes shortened to “cis”): someone who identifies with the gender assigned at birth.

Oh, and LETTERS! There are a few of those…

LGBT means lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (sometimes more letters are added, but I’ll stick with these for simplicity’s sake).

FTM is female to male, a person transitioning from a female to a male.

MTF is male to female, a person transitioning from a male to a female.

Gender isn’t as black and white as male/female. It gets more complicated than that. To use an image familiar to the LGBT, gender is a rainbow. Though male and female are at opposite ends of the spectrum, there are those who are outside that binary or in between it.

Also, an important thing to note… gender identity and sexual preference are NOT congruent. Just because someone’s gender identity is MTF doesn’t mean she likes men exclusively… She could like women and men, just women, or anyone in between!

Which reminds me, pronouns. To cisgendered people this is a simple matter. To transgendered people? Not so much. It is very offensive to ask a trans person “Are you a man or a woman?” A better thing to do would be to ask, “What is your preferred pronoun?”

(source: t-shirt design submitted to threadless.com)

Spivak pronouns, popularised by Michael Spivak in 2006, are used to describe those who aren't comfortable with he/she or the singular "they." The pronouns are ey (subject), em (object), eir (possessive adjective), eirs (possessive pronoun), ey (reflexive). 


Another more popular set of pronouns I've seen is ze, hir, hirs, and hirself. 


Confused? That's okay. It's much, much better to ask a transgendered person about preferred pronoun choice than to assume and accidentally offend or hurt.

Those are the absolute basics. I didn't want to overload you with too much information. As I write more entries, I'll trickle in other definitions and terms. Hopefully this hasn’t been dreadfully boring. Feel free to ask questions! In fact, I encourage it.

Transgendered Issues

I'm going to be writing about issues facing transgendered people. Because I'm interested in working with children, I'll probably be focusing on the youth.